35 years down and another day to go

Today, October 4, me and the Little Mrs. are marking five years of wedded bliss. Oh, we’ve been married for 35 years, I’m just counting ones that were happy.

I think that is an old Rodney Dangerfield joke, but I didn’t want my wife to  think I had gone all mushy or something.

But, 35 years with the same woman! Man, some of those big numbers roll around in life that make you stop and think ‘where did the time go?’

I had to remind my Mom last night where she was 35 years ago. Her first guess was playing euchre at the Pioneer Hotel in Williamsburg, Ontario, but I had to set her straight. “No Ma, you were in Cranbrook, B.C. You and Dad traveled West to see your baby boy get married.” I think she is still angry because she missed that evening of card play. (Truth is I don’t think my Mom ever was inside the Pioneer Hotel, although she’s dealt many a four-hand euchre game in a lot of places over her 85 years).

But, Ang and I have hung in there for the past 35 years. Not every day has been like a honeymoon – although I've been told I AM pretty special to live with. But overall it has been good. There have been what I expect are the usual ups and downs in a relationship. A few arguments, some give and take, and many issues of compromise on both sides (that’s the daily routine), but underlying it all is a solid foundation of love and respect and desire to make all work out. (And as these recent photos show we're still able to smile after all this time.)

And it’s been a good run. We have two great kids – young adults – who both seem to be well on their way in life; two adorable grand puppies – who bring us double joy every time they visit – joy when they come, joy when they go; a nice home, good health, good jobs and a very nice mortgage, which keeps us both energized to keep working those good jobs.

And for icing on the cake, we’ve also had the same toilet seat for 35 years. A hand painted, wooden seat, with the picture of a cow sleeping on a banana hammock between two trees on the underside of the lid. It was a wedding gift from Angie’s maid of honor, Kim. We’ve lived in about 10 different houses over the years, but the toilet seat has always made the journey. It is part of us. Like one of the family. It makes going to the bathroom fun. I think it also reminds my wife every time she looks at or sits on it, “we really do need a bathroom renovation.”

Enough of the sentimental journey. Thirty-five years down and another day to go. I’m not into long range planning. A guy never knows when some sweet young thing wants to kidnap you and make you her ‘boy toy’.

And now, let’s bow our heads and close with the Ten Commandments of Marriage, sent to me recently by pastor Ken Loschiavo of Winnipeg:

Commandment 1:
Marriages are made in heaven. But then again, so is thunder and lightning.



Commandment 2:
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.



Commandment 3:
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 500 grand!



Commandment 4: Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbours listen.

Commandment 5: When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.

Commandment 6: Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; he trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

Commandment 7: Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

Commandment 8: Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife (unless you are a Muslim or in Utah).

Commandment 9: Marriage and love are purely a matter of chemistry. That is why one treats the other like toxic waste.

Commandment 10: A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

And a short story about hope:

A long married couple came upon a wishing well. The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The husband decided to make a wish too. But he leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The wife was stunned for a moment, but then smiled, 'It really works!'

-30-